A fews weeks ago I stopped by Target hoping I wouldn't see anyone and ran into a childhood friend. Even though Stephanie was a year older, she included me in school and church activities. It was REALLY good seeing her and feel her awesome spirit. She said, "Marla, I follow your blog..." Ha! What blog? So, I promised I would write an entry. Hi Stephanie (and my 8 followers). Yo.
So.. the rest of the entry is actually one that has been sitting in my draft box for about 6 months. Shortly after my "18 friggin Years" entry I wrote a follow up, "What came Next". I didn't publish because I had more to write. Rather than write more... I will post and THEN write more. I know most people blog about their current situation I will eventually get to that, but felt compelled to start from the beginning. I have a strong belief that God puts us in different situations to mold us or prepare us for what is to come or what decisions we are to make in the future.
So.. what happened after we got hitched? After a quick honeymoon (don't read into that), Michael and I were quickly faced with reality. We rented a small apartment in Clinton, Utah. We weren't as concerned with the size, but grateful for the price which was a bargain at the time. Our apartment consisted of a large room that was divided by a wall. One side of the wall was our living room which fit a couch, lazy boy chair and small t.v. The other side of the wall was our bedroom which fit our queen size bed and dresser drawer. Our kitchen was basic and had a gradual slope that went into our bathroom. Every morning we could hear our neighbor getting ready (often times we could hear him peeing) and we would say good morning through the walls.
I had one semester left at Brigham Young University, which consisted of a full time internship in Therapeutic Recreation. I was fortunate to land a position at McKay Dee Hospital, under the direction of Shelly Oda. I had the unique experience of working with patients with varying diagnoses from strokes to traumatic brain, to spinal chord injuries. I worked with a team of doctors, physical and occupational therapists and other specialists in creating a plan that would help the individual regain quality of life, which included recreation and leisure. I still have vivid memories that shaped the way I how I view and treat others, no matter what situation they are in physically, mentally or emotionally. It also gave me a unique perspective that life can quickly change. Most of the patients I worked with were living "normal lives" and due to an unforeseen health issue, a decision they made, or being in the wrong place at the wrong time led to severe health issues that changed their life in an instance Paralysis, brain injuries, severe infections, breathing difficulties, speech, etc...
I can't remember how long a semester was (3 months) but during this time I was not able to work another job and believe I earned a $200 stipend.
Our first year of marriage was REALLY tough. Michael and I rarely saw each other, and when we did we were both exhausted and probably not our best selves. Coming into a marriage with very little savings, was a big shock on my system. I came from a home where my parents were quite generous. They paid for a majority of my schooling, apartment, food, and other needs. I didn't have to worry-- ever. I was really lonely, quite selfish, and always worried about how we were going to survive financially. Michael on the other hand was like, "what's the big deal..we pay our tithing.. things will work out." He had been on his own since he was 16, and this was not his first rodeo. Even though Michael was attending Weber State full time, he worked several jobs as a waiter, banquets at Weber State and a few graveyard shifts as a Psych Technician. I don't know how we did it, but we survived. Thank goodness.
After graduating from BYU in Therapeutic Recreation, I worked in a group home with adults with developmental disabilities for several months. I really enjoyed those I worked with, but who I worked for was painful. I was quickly promoted as a recreation therapist to the director's right hand women. I was completely taken advantage of, having to work long hours, graveyard shifts and on call (yes, I wore a sexy pager). My boss was an office smoker, had terrible language, and a complete disregard for people. I have never QUIT a job before, and it was a very difficult decision to make since I knew we needed my income to survive. Michael was completely supportive of my decision and I quit without having another job lined up.
I had heard that UPS was hiring in Salt Lake City, so we packed up and moved to an apartment in West Bountiful. We were blessed to find another affordable apartment behind the Chapman's home on 800 West. We were quickly welcomed to the neighborhood and made friends of all ages. I landed the job at UPS as a customer service representative, and Michael continued to commute to Weber State.
UPS has excellent health benefits and we went on a hay-day getting health and dental check ups. One thing that was bothering Michael were his wisdom teeth and we knew they needed to come out. It's customary for anyone serving an L.D.S. mission to get their wisdom teeth removed before they depart. I always wondered why Michael's were not removed. Upon his initial visit, the oral surgeon told Michael he had a small growth on the inside of his cheek that he could take out when he pulled his teeth. Michael said he had this growth for a long time. On the day of his surgery, I took Michael in so I could drive him home. I remember reading a magazine and the doctor came out during the procedure. He explained that the growth was much bigger than he expected and felt that someone with more experience should handle it. He said he was able to take a sample and wanted to biopsy it to make sure it wasn't cancerous. Huh? Cancerous? He reassured that this was more of a precautionary measure and would be very rare if it came back cancerous.
Several days past. Mike is working and our neighbors are over for a visit. The phone rings. It's Mike. "Hi Marla, how are you?" (in an upbeat voice). I don't want you to worry (sudden pit in my stomach). I. have. cancer.
